


Plan

by DigiConjurer



Series: Palette (A Bernadetta Collection) [6]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bernadetta von Varley Needs a Hug, Bernadetta von Varley's Father's Bad Parenting, F/F, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Blue Lions Route Spoilers, Housewife Bernadetta, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Post-Canon, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Spoilers for Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Stepford Wife, Suicide Attempt, Weddings, unstable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:01:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25867870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DigiConjurer/pseuds/DigiConjurer
Summary: Housewife!Bernadetta but it's Blue Lions and she's soloing the final map. This will totally go wrong... right?
Relationships: Edelgard von Hresvelg/Bernadetta von Varley
Series: Palette (A Bernadetta Collection) [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1765405
Kudos: 10





	Plan

I don't own Fire Emblem

* * *

Bernadetta wasn’t entirely sure why the Professor decided that this was her opportunity to shine. The war was already closing in on a suitable end. Here in Embarr, this was just a victory lap before she could go to the grocery store in peace. While part of the Blue Lions, she had taken on more of a support role - making meals and serving as moral support. 

Actually serving on the front lines? That would be silly. Any combat potential she may have had was beat straight out by her wonderful piece of shit in human form that was her father. Bless his ability to turn fierce warriors into obedient housewives.

The imperial palace was a lot larger than Bernadetta remembered. Though, she chalked it up too the last visit involving an attempted hanging to leave this life for good. An attempt that was sadly denied by all parties and instead fulfilled by her father taking that place instead. Beyond the point for the moment. 

"Really? This is all you're going to throw at me?" a booming voice announced, our housewife taking this as her opportunity to hide behind a pillar and hope to Seiros she wasn't discovered. A futile effort, one that could easily get in the way of the mission at hand if she wasn't careful. "Fine then. I'll just force him to come out!"

Bernadetta closed her eyes. If she was lucky, this would just be a bad dream. The sort that could only be woke up from by death. Try as she might, there is no escape from this situation. Either face it head-on or die trying. Maybe both. Especially as she felt her body get pulled out into the corridor proper. There, Edelgard awaited. But not the familiar white-haired woman Bernadetta had grown to love over the years. No, this was a large, almost angelic beast that towered over even the mightiest of demonic beasts. A strange kind of beauty, the sort that could only work with Edelgard in Bernadetta's mind.

“So the traitor has finally decided to show her face.” Edelgard announced, a large bony hand being raised up - a large orb of energy forming within. Flinging it out, Bernadetta scrambled to get out of the way. Digging into her bag, she looked for anything that could actually deal damage to the woman she loved. Or at least something that would provide protection.

“Here we go.” Bernadetta thought, grabbing a knife out of her pinafore. She wasn’t completely sure how that got there, but the blood upon the blade was absolutely beautiful. Maybe a feast was in order. Would Edelgard like human flesh? Maybe in this form she absolutely would. If not, there were other meaty alternatives that would work here. “For the record, this is the first time I’ve been on the front lines this entire war. I’ve spent a whole lot of time making meals and tending to people’s wounds.”

Edelgard rolled her eyes, charging towards Bernadetta. Byleth was obviously mocking her at this moment. An absolute coward of a person, the sort who preferred to hide behind people rather than go out and deal with the problem. Some things never change.

"So you stood there and watched your very own classmates die?" Edelgard screeched and swung at the housewife. While Bernadetta managed to get out of the way, her knife did little on the way of damage. Probably healed Edelgard. At least her bubble bouffant was still together. If not, she would be really pissed. The time she had to spend in the chair had felt like an eternity. Especially when you have to convince your stylist to go through with this particular style.

"You let my father turn me into his toy." Bernadetta announced and for a nearby pillar. She didn't get too far - Edelgard smashing that pillar away. "Every day, I hoped to Seiros you would come to my rescue and bring an end to this nightmare. But no, little Bernadetta and her patriarchal father fell off the list of problems that needed to be solved. You probably moved onto Dorothea. She’s always sed-"

Bernadetta didn't get to finish her sentence, Edelgard scooping the housewife up and lifting her up into the air. Their gazes met, a tear rolling down Edelgard's face.

"My heart was broken when you accepted the offer to join the Blue Lions. Even beyond Dimitri, beyond Byleth and this war… I want you."

The words rang out and Bernadetta dug into her bag one more time. There had to be something else in here that could sooth Edelgard’s worries. Even if she probably already knew the answer to such an internal question. This bag was packed right before heading to Embarr. There was no way someone had tampered with it… right? That would be silly and more than enough of a reason to stab whoever decided that was a good idea.

“That bastard…” she thought, pulling a ring box out. Of course someone had planned for just about everything. She was going to stab them after this. “Will you marry me, my dear emperor?”

.

_ 6 Days Later… _

“So let me get this straight, Byleth ” Dimitri announced, gaze already shifting to his husband. The temptation was still very much there to just run up and stab his cousin over this mess. But it was Edelgard’s big day. He was more than willing to wait. Even if it was very clear that they were going to Rhea. “You slipped a ring box into her bag, with the sole intention that these two would work it out and get together?”

Byleth nodded, only to find his face getting pulled about. He wasn't completely sure why Dimitri did that, even if it felt kind of good. He could get used to this. Even if he did doubt it would last any longer.

"Yep." the professor answered, gaze shifting to Edelgard and Bernadetta. While unable to find a dress to fit the former, getting one for our housewife had thankfully been a cinch. White was most definitely her color. "Usually, Bernadetta dies by fire. This is a very much better outcome."

That remark got him a look, but he ignored it as the ceremony began. There was nothing better than seeing Bernadetta’s beautiful smile after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, that was fun. Even if I am tempted to do one more Berniegard fic. Maybe a normal one. Who knows.


End file.
